She Don't Want to Commit.. but

[xlf3]

Okay so there is this girl that I like, and she likes me. You would think, might as well be in a relationship right? We known each other for 3 months. After the first 6 weeks you know we do the friend thing, just hang out and talk. Sometimes we cuddle, and kissed each other on the lips a couple times. No big deal right? I asked her out. I liked her and she claimed she liked me. She says "I don't wanna be tied down, not right now." "Alright.. but you kiss me and trust me and like me like that you claimed." "It's complicated let's just leave it like we are, just think of me as your a girl who you like and care about with no major attachment." I was okay with it.

After that we started going farther. Like she gave me a hand job, I fingered her and such. Started making out more. That just complicated things... but we loved it so we kept going with it.

After a month or so.. we are having sex. She was a virgin before this. So I asked her if she felt tied down to me. She said "No, I'm free to do what I want to but I don't want to do anything but spend time with you" I said "So what your saying is, you care about me" She said "I love you" Woah, HOW CAN YOU LOVE SOMEONE BUT NOT COMMIT? I said oh and I kissed her and she fell asleep, I left, and I left her a note saying "My parents called and they want me over something came up, I'll text you later then call you"

About a week ago this girl asked me if I wanted to go to a movie. I said sure why not.

Think of me as a girl who you like and care about but have no major attachments to

That didn't change, so thats what I thought of her as.
The day of the movie, she texted me and said what you doing later? I said going to a movie with a friend. She replied "oh with who?" I told her. She got mad at me. WTF I mean for real? So I didn't go to the movie. I told her I decided not to go, and wanted to spend time with her and she got mad because I didn't go, and she made plans with her bestfriend! Note: I canceled the date in 5 minutes. I was thinking seriously JUST MAKE UP YOUR DAMN MIND! Why get mad about me going, then get mad because I didn't go, and wanted to spend time with you.

I mean I care about her a lot. I think I do love her. It's just complicated. What should I do with this? Treat it as a relationship or just act like she's my friend with benefits? (I hate that, it's pointless, but is that what she wants?)

[Haze]

Women...

Besides enjoying the fucking around do you two ever spend time just talking? Getting to know each other better? I would try and determine the cause of why she doesn't want to commit (there has to be an underlying factor in why she isn't already your gf right now).

Also you can be like woman, you're the one who doesnt want to be with me, don't complain when I do my own shit.

I wouldn't have canceled plans if I was you- you two are fucking, you'll hang out within a few days anyway. You probably haven't seen that other friend since right? So often people in relationships devote themselves to the other person and their personal friendships fall on the wayside. "Gotta keep your pimphand strong"

[TACO_HATER]

Shouldn't of cancelled on the other bitch shoulda gone. That chick has got her hand up your ass you're her puppet. You gotta make her feel like she needs to go the next step to control you. And then you'll get it lol

[xlf3]

I wanted to show her I cared guys. I guess that didn't work.

Besides enjoying the fucking around do you two ever spend time just talking? Getting to know each other better?

Yes we talk all the time, she trusts me.

You probably haven't seen that other friend since right?

I gave her a ride to Walmart and back the next day.

I would try and determine the cause of why she doesn't want to commit (there has to be an underlying factor in why she isn't already your gf right now).

I can't say for sure, but I think it's because of her friend, I dated one of her friends for like 2 weeks, broke up with her cause I thought she was a bitch. I didn't do anything with that girl, but still. I don't know. I'll try to find out.

You gotta make her feel like she needs to go the next step to control you. And then you'll get it lol

I tried to play sweet, but I gotta stop kissing ass. I'm nobody's bitch

Thanks guys.

[Lyk31337]

Think you love her?
You don't, you like either
A. The idea of love or B. Getting laid and such

Play it like you don't give a fuck and she will come to you, you're making this way to easy for her to rule the "relationship".

[xlf3]

I'm not in love with her. I care for her and love her as a friend. That's what I meant. Yes I do like doing stuff with her. I just don't like the idea of not doing it with someone who isn't with me. Do you guys understand what I'm saying?

[Lyk31337]

I'm not in love with her. I care for her and love her as a friend. That's what I meant. Yes I do like doing stuff with her. I just don't like the idea of not doing it with someone who isn't with me. Do you guys understand what I'm saying?

I get what you're saying but its quite sad that she is quite immature if she wants to do her own thing and either isn't ready for a relationship or thinks you aren't. She honestly may just think of you as a fuckbuddy.

[xlf3]

I don't know I want her as a friend regardless, I'll keep it up until
1. She wants a relationship
2. I find someone who does.

[Jason]

I am personally against the whole fuck buddy thing. Mainly because people get hurt; like you might. Or she is. When you're that close to someone for an extended period of time (and it seems you were friends before-hand also) you develop feeling for them. You wouldn't like it if she randomly started dating someone else, or started fucking someone else, right? Boundaries have to be made. You really should talk to her. Just because you want an exclusive relationship doesn't mean it has to be a super-serious relationship.

[xlf3]

I'm against it to Jason, and yes it would be hurt if she dated someone else, or started dong this with someone else. I mean I want her to be my gf. Not my friend with benefits. I'm trying to talk to her about she says she'll think about it.

[Jason]

When it comes down to it, you'll probably have to tell her to make an ultimatum.

[Ammoseller]

Also, do not, for the love of God, throw the word "love" around. It is one of the biggest blunders one can make, and is a word to not be taken lightly.

[Djzzero]

Women are so bipolar. That's all I gotta say. That's why its better to just keep DTF girls no strings attached lol, till you find someone you really want ;D.

---------- Post added at 11:52 AM ---------- Previous post was at 11:51 AM ----------

Also love is such a strong word and shouldn't be used if they really mean it.

[Haze]

If you change your mind and want to get rid of her fast, take the opposite of Ammo's advice, and be like "I love you sooo much omg oomg omg omg i loveeee you," she'll be gone in an instant! (I want to try this sometime)

[Ammoseller]

If you change your mind and want to get rid of her fast, take the opposite of Ammo's advice, and be like "I love you sooo much omg oomg omg omg i loveeee you," she'll be gone in an instant! (I want to try this sometime)

The problem with this is, she might be one of those "OMG I LOVE YOU TOO" psychopathic women, and ergo you lock yourself into a long lasting relationship that functions as a prison, but at least without you being subjected to anal sodomization (at least, we hope).

[Nick]

Or take the even better plan of start staying the fuck away from her. If she can't commit yet she claims to 'love you' then she obviously has some emotional problems and isn't a smart idea to try to get any farther. Yeah sure, it's nice to have a fuck buddy, but like Jason said, someone's gunna get hurt. Move on, find a new girl who isn't emotionally fucked up, and forget about her.

Sorry if this sounds cold, but trust me, bitches be crazy.

Sent from my Milestone using Tapatalk

[Commodore]

There is only one way to go with this. Who are you going to hurt being a fuck buddy? Half the guys here wish they had one or two. Years from now you will be thinking that a few more rolls in the hay would have been better than fewer moments of glory. Trust me.

[Ammoseller]

A COMMUNIST

[TACO_HATER]

Smoke weed every day. Problem solved ya dig?

[xlf3]

We talked about it for a long time WED. I told her I didn't want to anyone getting hurt, and it's either be my girlfriend or friend. She said she don't want the pressure, so I got a little mad, and sad alright don't talk to me for a while. It was fun while it lasted.